Harper

Last week, in the midst of our Christmas vacation we received a call from a social worker asking if we would be willing to take in a 2 1/2 year old girl named Harper. She was removed from her mom and dad after they and she tested positive for pot and meth. They took her to the Christmas box house until they could find a suitable place for her. 

“Heavenly Father, should we help out this little girl who needs us?”  It’s one of those questions that when you vocalize it in a prayer, you realize the answer before the words reach his ears. “Are we the right family to help out?”  Maybe a bit better of a question but even still, we know He wants us to help and love and serve wherever possible. 

Well, as I have alluded, we just felt it was a time we had to say yes and we asked for the strength to help out Harper as she came into our home. 

She is a sweet little girl. For the most part she seems to be handling well the trauma of being taken to two strange locations away from her mom. And even though her home life may be volatile and hard, to her it’s normal, and this environment is not. 

The boys have been good to surround her with loads of love and attention. Even the neighbor kids and cousins and grandparents and aunts and uncles are so caring and accepting of Harper. When the boys were gone the other day and the house got quiet, Harper seemed to feel scared and lonely. Then Patzi cuddled up to her and brightened her mood. .    

I hesitate to paint too much of a bleak picture of her home life. No doubt there are some bad actions that have lead to this but this girl has had a lot of love. She sings happily lots of songs. You can tell her mom has been really involved in a positive way. Right now Harper is trying to sleep but she is having a hard time because she was crying for mom.  

I’m unsure if she means her mom or Jenn. It’s just been 4 days and she is already calling Jenn “mom.”  This makes Jenn uncomfortable as she worries that Harper will call her mom at the first meeting with her real mom. 

We really don’t know where this will go. She could be placed again with another family member this week. Or she could stay with us for a little while until her parents get custody again. Or this could drag out for much much longer. We will just place one foot in front of the other. Best we can do right now. 

It’s 1/12/21 now. Harper has been with us for almost 2 weeks. Poor girl had her first live parental visit today. Up till now, it’s all been virtual meetings. She’s been so sad since we came home today.  I can’t imagine the heart ache she is experiencing. She kept saying, “I’m sad, can you help me feel better?”  We’ve been taking turns sitting in her room now for the last 2 hours. Keat was just in here.  He had Patzi come lay with her. I think that really helped her. 

When you see the torture Harper is going through it’s hard not to be angry with her parents.  I can only imagine how wrecked her parents are though. Sure, they messed up really bad — multiple times!  Still, I know they must be really sad about it. I wonder if they will be able to clean their lives up enough to convince the courts that it’s safe for Harper to be with them.